Thursday, February 21, 2008

Strike News

Frank and Larry return, but this time Frank is a TV anchorman and Larry is a striking writer. Or is that the other way around? Oh just watch it your own damn self and see. Thank you.

I Will NOT Reject Myself, I Will NOT Reject Myself...

Going on a lot of auditions means opening yourself up to a lot of rejection, so it's tempting to beat the other guys to the punch and reject yourself first. It's really easy to come up with reasons you won't get the part before the audition ever starts: they'll go with someone taller, or younger, or better looking, or more closely related to the casting director, or something. On one recent audition, I was actually a little upset with my agent for sending me. The role: a retarded inbred hick. I mean, come on. I know my type, and that's not my type. What a total waste of time. So, naturally, I had a callback Tuesday. Apparently, retarded inbred hick is my type. Live and learn. Since the callback location was close by my agent's office, I decided to drop in, because I'm that important; OK, because I help out around the office once in a while. Anyway, while I'm there the call comes in for an audition that afternoon. This time, I'm supposed to be a businessman. Of course, I look like a hick. My agent reminds me that I should always have a suit in my car. I tell her that it's a very good idea that unfortunately is of no use to me today. But I do have a somewhat rumpled blazer from a previous job, so I rush to the casting office and give my best, although I'm sure my rumpled appearance is counting against me. But Wednesday morning, I get the callback for the afternoon. So I ran around like a crazy person getting my shoes and car keys — the poor dog was running after me, thinking we were going to go somewhere really exciting — and dashed out the door. Fortunately I didn't have to take time to change clothes — I was still wearing the outfit I had auditioned in. Yep, I had fallen asleep in my clothes. I was the only actor there who wasn't wearing a dark, pinstriped suit, but I didn't let that throw me. I just kept telling myself I was good enough to get the callback in my jeans, boots and blazer, so I should be good enough to get the job in my jeans, boots, and blazer. It would have been nice if I'd had time to wash my clothes, though, or least take a shower. Then again, it's television, not smell-o-vision.

Saturday, February 09, 2008

In Which I Almost Deliver a Pizza

My friend Summer, who previously tapped me for Caesar and Otto in the Summer Camp Massacre, asked me Thursday night if I would be interested in being in another project she was working on. It would be a bit part, delivering a pizza to the protagonist, but I enjoy any opportunity to practice my craft, I happened to be available, the production was about 10 minutes from my current residence, and there was the distinct possibility I'd get to eat some of the pizza when we wrapped. But soon after I arrived on location today, the director decided he could use me in a different role with a little more screen time and a couple more lines. Sweet! It was like ordering a pizza and having them throw in a side of wings! I even got to improv a little, and I ate three slices when we were done.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Have Some Pie

I know a lot of people out there have been craving a sweet follow-up to the recently posted video, even though you're too shy to come right out and ask for it. (In fact, you're too shy to say anything.) But that's OK. Here's another course for you. Everybody loves pie.

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Short Subject

Here's a little something I worked on in December. Despite how it may look, I am not a little person. Not that there's anything wrong with that. The big guy and I were in a previous short film in which we basically provided annoying background noise for the principal characters. The director enjoyed our inane chatter so much that he came up with a project just for us. It's just two guys talking on a light-rail platform. Maybe I can use it as an audition reel for The Hobbit.

Friday, February 01, 2008

Whomp! Upside the Head

When you're auditioning with another actor, and the session runner has said,“Don't hurt each other,” it might be a good idea not to hurt the other actor. In fact, it might be a good idea even if no one actually says don't hurt the other actor. Just take it for granted that you aren't supposed to whomp the other guy upside the head. On the brighter said, I had two auditions today in which I did not get whomped upside the head, so I guess on average I did pretty well.